THE A-Z OF SEX IN JAPAN

It's a good thing we're not using the Japanese alphabet or we'd be here all year. Just the humble Western A-Z to bring you a range of terms and concepts connected to the problematic question of sex in Japan, often seen as the world's "kinkiest" if not necessarily sexiest nation. 

A – Ahegao (アヘ顔)
This is the exaggerated facial expression (see above) associated with orgasm, often depicted in hentai manga and anime, characterized by rolled-back eyes, flushed cheeks, and an open mouth. Now that it has even been adopted by Westerners like Belle Delphine, Japan has got to tariff that shit!  

B – Bukkake  (打っ掛け, ブッカケ)
Here's one for those who believe Japan has given the world nothing. Taken from the verb bukkakeru, to dash or splash), this merry little activity was considered a punishment at one time, involving a protagonist, several supporting players, and a whole lotta mopping up afterwards. 

C – Chikan (痴漢)
Not to be confused with the delicate Indian embroidery of the same name, chikan are so central to society that in some cities they've even inspired their own train. Not that they're allowed to ride in it, of course. This group of social daredevils get their kicks groping innocents in crowded environments, thriving on the sardine-tight subways of Japan's larger metropolises. Tut-tutting from the authorities has led to a decline in recent years.

D – Dekapai (デカパイ)

Or "big tits" to you and I, dekapai are the stuff of otaku dreams. While anime has transformed them into a proud art form, scientifically impossible breasts aren't merely the stuff of fantasy. Leading 3D dekapai idols include Yoko Matsugane (see above), a well-known gravure idol from the 2000s. Matsugane released numerous photobooks and DVDs, with her curvy physique in magazines like Sabra. 

E – Enjo Kousai (濴助交際)
The woke term for enjo kousai is "assisted dating", which makes it sound like a recovery program for the romantically challenged. Reportedly on the decline, the phenomenon once provided relief for two subsections of society – Japan's sexually depressed CEOs and the financially impoverished kogaru (high school girls) desperate to keep up with expensive trends and transient fashions. Child prostitution or comfort for the elderly? Take your pick.

F – Fashion Health (ファッションヘルス)

Another misleading phrase that has little to do with its apparent subject. A "fashion health" massage takes place in a brothel or "love hotel," rather than a gym, and involves everything the male mind could wish for, short of actual intercourse...apparently.

G – Gokkun (ゴックン)
The onomatopoeic cousin of bukkake, gokkun is the sound of someone swallowing. One human vessel and several eager donors required. ‘Nuff said.

H – "H" (エッ)

"H" is the first letter of the word hentai and is therefore afforded supreme status in our little wordbook, for without hentai and its associated pictorial success the world would know little of Japan's outlandish sexual practices. Suitably perversely, the locals pronounce it "ecchi," the first word most foreigners learn after "watashi wa..."

I – Imekura (イメージクラブ)

Short for "image club," a type of brothel or sexy club, where workers dress in themed costumes (e.g., schoolgirls, nurses, air stewardesses, etc) to fulfil specific male fantasies. May have therapeutic value.

J – Japasen (ジャパセン)

This is foreign men, particularly Westerners, who started dating Japanese women out of desperation after finding their own women less than welcoming, but who now prefer dating mid-level Japanese chicks even when high level Western women make themselves available. Scientists have yet found no explanation for this unaccountable phenomenon.

K – Kinbaku (緊縛)

A traditional Japanese rope bondage practice emphasizing aesthetic patterns and restraint, distinct from Western BDSM styles. Actually, at times it can be almost as sexless as a knitting circle. Also, rope burns are not an aphrodisiac.

L – Love Dolls (ラブドール)

It's unsurprising that the Japanese (along with the Germans) were first to develop the sturdier big sister to the Dutch-inspired blow-up doll, but few could have foreseen the levels this study in perversion would attain. Manufacturers fight to better each other with new and sinister features, such as the "Sayaka Deep Kiss" model, now complete with removable, washable vagina and head.

M – Mizuage (水濚㿒) 
As seen in Memoirs of a Geisha (100% accurate), the mizuage ceremony is the ceremonial deflowering of a maiko to the highest bidder. And curse the blighters who suggest the geisha world is related to prostitution. 

N – No-Pan-Kissa  (ノーパン喫茶)
A lot of the weird stuff in Japan is caused by attempts to circumvent the awkwardly framed prostitution laws. For example, back in the roaring 80s and screaming 90s, No-Pan Kissa were the discerning salaryman's way to enjoy sexual shenanigans without breaking the law. The phenomenon featured waitresses, short skirts, no underwear and a lot of mirrored flooring, and a lot of "extras." Now no longer needed, possibly because of maid cafes!

O – Onsen Geisha (温泉芸者)

Again, not quite the thriving workforce they once were, Onsen Geisha preceded soapland workers by a few decades, performing rather unglamorous after-bath sexual services in the sort of out-of-the-way spots where hot water bubbles out of the ground.

P – Pink Salon (ピンクサロン)
Basically blow job shops with an open-plan, bar-like setting, where the customer will first get a drink so that the establishment can satisfy the Japanese government that its main attraction is a small plastic cup of lukewarm oolong tea (possibly with a cigarette butt floating in it) rather than anything the girls might do. Them legal loopholes have gotta be lubed!

Q – "Queer" (クィア)
This virile Western import has recently started to displace the humble native "okama," the term previously used to refer to the gay and transgender fraternity. This is partly through the work of novelist, critic, and activist Noriaki Fushimi. In Japan the term "queer" often has a more nebulous and shifting definition than it does in the West.

R – Roshutsu (露出)

A common practice in the adult film industry, roshutsu involves revealing the naughty bits outdoors, often in public places. Not to be mixed up with people just chilling out at the local onsen.

S – Soapland (ソープランド)

A brothel where clients receive body-on-body massages and (full?) sexual services. Originally called "Turkish baths" before an angry Ankara insisted on a more frothy rebranding.

T – Tentacle Rape (触手強姦, shokushu goukan)
A sci-fi fetish that seems to have origins in Shintoism. Since woodblock artist Hokusai's renowned piece, The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife, the depiction of women impaled on tentacles has found its way into numerous hentai manga. Only in Japan (and other nations with large horny cephalopods)!

U – Ukiyo-e Shunga (浮世絵春画)

Erotic woodblock prints from the Edo period, depicting sexual scenes with artistic flair and often oversized genitalia, unlike traditional Western art where the "meat and two veg" are made humiliatingly small.

V – Video Erotica (ビデオエロチカ)
Japan’s vast industry of erotic videos, which includes both adult videos (AV) and softer "gravure" idol content. Unlike grotty Western porn, Japanese AV often emphasizes life-affirming narratives and role-play, with an edifying storyline of the sort where a high schoolgirl gets "bukkaked" or has an eggplant shoved up her whoopsie. Gravure idol videos focusing on softer stuff like suggestive poses and costumes, often tied to the (dekapai) aesthetic.

W – Waisetsu (猥褻)

The legal term for "obscenity," governing what’s permissible in Japanese pornography, leading to practices like pixelated censorship and customs officials industriously scratching out key bits of your "art books" with a coin.

X – X-Jenda (Xジェンダー)

A term for non-binary or genderqueer identities in Japan, reflecting modern shifts in understanding gender and sexuality. Yeh, I know it's a crap entry, but at least we got X done!

Y – Yaoi (やおい)

A genre of fictional media focusing on romantic or sexual relationships between men, primarily created for female audiences. WTF?

Z – Zenra (全裸)
Literally "completely nude," a niche pornographic genre where women perform everyday tasks, like gutting a fish or hoovering a tatami mat, completely or partially naked, emphasizing voyeuristic appeal.